Breaking Up

Breaking Up is Hard to Do (But You’ll Get Through it). Grab a cuppa and settle in, mates, because I’m about to dish all the details on the messiest of pickles: breakups. You know the drill. One minute you’re happier than a kid in a candy store, the next you’re sadder than a bloke who’s just been told the pint’s run dry.

It’s brutal out there in Splitsville. Emotions are spilling everywhere like a knocked over pint, and you start questioning everything from your taste in takeaway to your taste in partners. But chin up – this too shall pass. Before you know it, you’ll be right as rain and ready for new romance. Just hang in there and remember: you’ve got this! Stiff upper lip now.

Got Dumped? How to Survive and Thrive

Aw, you poor lamb. Getting dumped is about as fun as stubbing your toe or getting caught in the rain sans brolly. It’s as pleasant as finding a hair in your soup or realizing your fly’s been down all day. I know it’s tempting to mope about in your dressing gown whilst demolishing a tub of ice cream, but don’t let someone who couldn’t recognize a good thing if it bit them on the bum ruin your fabulousness!

You are a fully-loaded fry up, and you deserve someone who appreciates all your brown sauce, eggs, baked beans, tomato, sausage, and toast. But until Mr. or Mrs. Right comes along, here’s how to regain your mojo:

Let it out, then carry on

Go ahead and ugly cry to your mate or the cat, vent to your diary, and belt out sad songs in the shower. We’ve all been there! Just set a time limit, then wash your face, slap on some war paint, and get back to the business of living your best life. They’re not worth wasting any more tissues on.

Detox your space

Remove all traces of the ex from your dwelling. Redecorate, deep clean, rearrange furniture, and make that space your own again. Don’t dwell on “what ifs” from the past. Out with old, in with the new!

**Get busy with a social calendar **

Wallowing on the sofa with sad films and takeaway will only make you question yourself. Nip that urge in the bud by surrounding yourself with mates and saying yes to every invite. Let your friends nourish your soul and remind you of your worth.

Flirt with optimism

When those gremlins of self-doubt start creeping in, drown them out by making a list of all your amazing qualities, talents, and quirks. Focus on all the things that make you, you! Soon you’ll be remembering what a catch you are.

**Shake up your habits **

Take a new route to work, try a different cafe or pub, join a club, rearrange your furniture. Changing your scenery and routine helps shake off old ghosts. Out with the constant reminders!

Get gussied up

Nothing perks you up post-breakup like an external makeover. Treat yourself to a new hairdo, revamp your wardrobe, or experiment with makeup. Take time to pamper yourself. You’ll remember how fab you really look!

Put yourself back out there

When the time is right, dip your toe back into dating. Say yes to any setups, flirt with cuties at the pub, or download the apps. Remind yourself of all the fish in the sea who’d love a chip like you! The world is your oyster.

You Did the Dumping? Read This

First of all, cheers to you for knowing your worth and deciding enough’s enough. Even if it left the other person gobsmacked, you did what was right for you. Don’t let guilt eat away at you like a loose thread on a jumper.

Stay strong and move forward

Your ex will probably try to win you back through tears, bargaining, or even anger. Stand firm in your decision, but don’t be cruel. Acknowledge their feelings without reconsidering the breakup. You ended it for good reasons.

Give each other space

Limit contact to essentials and refrain from checking in just to be “friendly.” You both need time and distance to heal, not constant reminders. Change your patterns and resist the urge to console them.

Surround yourself with your real friends

Lean on your trusted mates who nurture your soul. Make memories with the ones who remind you of your worth and bring out the best in you. Good friends are key to moving on.

Get out there and have fun

Wallowing on the sofa with sad films will only make you question yourself. Counteract that urge by filling your calendar with activities and people that spark joy. Surround yourself with positive energy.

List their dealbreakers

When nostalgia creeps in, re-read old messages or make a list of the red flags and dealbreakers that led you to end it. This will help snap you out of viewing your ex through rose-coloured glasses.

Reflect on your ideal partner

Use this transition time to get clear on your priorities and must-haves for a healthy relationship. Figure out where it went wrong so your next partnership is a better fit. The single life is brill for self-reflection!

Can You Stay Friends With An Ex?

This is trickier than parallel parking whilst absolutely trollied. Some successful friendships emerge from breakup ashes, but many go down in spectacular flames. Use your judgment based on these factors:

  • Pre-relationship history – Were you mates first? Or did you barely know them and then catch feelings? Former friends often transition back better.
  • How it ended – The more bitter or messy the breakup, the less likely you’ll salvage a friendship. Mutual split with no hard feelings makes it smoother.
  • Emotional state – Are either of you still gutted or bitter? Those feelings need to be fully resolved before attempting friendship.
  • Maturity levels – Can you both handle this with grace, respect, and boundaries? Or will drama ensue and issues resurface?
  • Motivations – Honestly assess if you truly want friendship or are secretly hoping lingering romantic feelings reignite.

The ex in the room FAQ

Still feeling a bit rubbish and confused? Don’t worry, mate. Let’s break down the most common post-breakup questions with straight talk:

Should I unfriend/unfollow them on social media?

Abso-bloody-lutely! The last thing you need right now is to watch your ex galavanting around looking well chuffed without you. Hit that unfollow and protect your peace.

Is it pathetic to still miss them this much?

Of course not! You cared deeply so it’s natural to grieve the loss. Just set a time limit on the moping. The sun will still rise tomorrow, and you’ve got better days ahead.

Should I drunk dial them?

Are you daft?! Put. The phone. Down. Nothing good ever comes of late night tipsy calls or texts. Sober up, splash some water on your face, and phone a friend instead.

What if they want to get back together?

Proceed with extreme caution. Unless the breakup issues have been resolved, history will probably repeat itself. Only reunite if you’re certain permanent positive changes have been made.

How do I stop obsessively stalking their social media?

Go cold turkey – block or unfollow them everywhere. Delete their number and photos. Every time you’re tempted, distract yourself with a walk, funny video call, or even doing squats. Break the addictive habit!

When should I start dating again?

That depends, but a good rule of thumb is to wait until you’ve processed the breakup, resolved residual feelings, and regained your mojo. When you’re craving new romance versus needing it to fill a void, you’re likely ready.

How do I stop feeling like I’ll never find love again?

Stay positive! Make a list of all the amazing things you bring to a relationship and what you really want in your ideal partner. Better matches are out there, but you’ve got to believe you deserve that. Fake it until you make it!

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In Closing, Mates

Welp, that’s the whole messy business summed up for you. Breakups are never fun, but they also aren’t the end of the road. Take time to heal, get your groove back, and reignite your inner sparkle. One chapter has closed, but your story’s far from over.

When you least expect it, you’ll cross paths with someone new who appreciates all your brown sauce and then some. Until then, remember how amazingly brilliant you are and keep on keeping on. Your happy ending is coming!

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